Category Archives: birds

Evil Birds

 These birds are up to no good.

Birds are inherently creepy creatures. They are frighteningly intelligent but lack all the warm fuzziness of mammals. You can see it in their eyes.

I came across some seagulls today, and they were up to no good. They were standing in place, all facing the same direction.

The seagulls were all facing the same direction. Immediately, I know this was something the world needed to see. I reached for my camera, but the birds were two fast; they flew off.

Stunned, I stood still for a while and pondered what I had just seen. What were the seagulls doing? Practicing military drills? Waiting for more birds to join in before they took Buffalo?

It occurred to me that maybe the birds were all facing west because it was windy out and their light, aerodynamic bodies probably get tossed about like the garbage they eat unless they put a lot of effort into it.

But then the birds came back. Whatever purpose facing west served, it was important, because they did it again. (They must be like the T-rex in Jurassic Park: if you stand perfectly still, they can’t see you.)

This time I moved made slow, non-threatening movements to free my camera. You can see the picture below.

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A Google of “evil birds” returns only 840,000 blog-heavy hits. We are normally a vocal group. Spread the message of warning! The birds are up to no good.